Wednesday 29 July 2009

Off To Save The World Again Gord?

Is It a Whale? Is It a Hippo? No It's Stuporman!

Be honest Gordon, it's not a good look mate.
Dave isn't going to fall for it and Mandy is pissing himself laughing behind your back.
Best ask nurse to up the meds a bit eh?

Tuesday 28 July 2009

Monday 27 July 2009

Brown's New Look.

"The Prime Minister's dentist is believed to be Mervyn Drurian, of the exclusive London Centre for Cosmetic Dentistry in Hampstead, north London, but he was the soul of discretion when Mandrake called. If it is the case that Brown has become a grinder, then Drurian is likely to recommend an occlusal splint, which Brown would have to insert into his mouth at bedtime. The device tends to make the wearer look a bit like Hannibal Lecter, but it does protect the teeth from wear and reduce jaw muscle activity, and – good news for Sarah, perhaps – the noise of teeth grinding."

H/T Events dear boy, events.

Saturday 25 July 2009

Swine Flu Advice.



The little piggy pic, in the above, came in an email and I don't know who to thank for it but whoever you are it made I larf!

Friday 24 July 2009

Peter Has an Idea for Gordon.

You Aren't Wanted.


16.5% swing in Norwich Peter. The worst figures on the economy since 1955 published today, with more to come.

Your Nasty Party isn't wanted and neither is your puppet government. Tell Gord the truth and then fuck off the lot of you.

Thursday 23 July 2009

Ooops!


It is treason felony to "compass, imagine, invent, devise, or intend":

  • to deprive the Queen of her crown,
  • to levy war against the Queen, or
  • to "move or stir" any foreigner to invade the United Kingdom or any other country belonging to the Queen.


3. Offences herein mentioned declared to be felonies

If any person whatsoever shall, within the United Kingdom or without, compass, imagine, invent, devise, or intend to deprive or depose our Most Gracious Lady the Queen, from the style, honour, or royal name of the imperial crown of the United Kingdom, or of any other of her Majesty’s dominions and countries, or to levy war against her Majesty, within any part of the United Kingdom, in order by force or constraint to compel her to change her measures or counsels, or in order to put any force or constraint upon or in order to intimidate or overawe both Houses or either House of Parliament, or to move or stir any foreigner or stranger with force to invade the United Kingdom or any other of her Majesty’s dominions or countries under the obeisance of her Majesty, and such compassings, imaginations, inventions, devices, or intentions, or any of them, shall express, utter, or declare, by publishing any printing or writing ... or by any overt act or deed, every person so offending shall be guilty of felony, and being convicted thereof shall be liable ... to be transported beyond the seas for the term or his or her natural life.

Thursday 16 July 2009

Apologies for My Absence!


I am now the proud owner of two of the above.
They were installed by the finest team of surgeons in the UK early last Friday.
They also stuck a balloon in for a bit of a laugh, although they took it back before I could pop it!
Anyway, it would appear that all systems are now go, and I no longer have an excuse for the lack of new pics on the blog.

Gordon is still a monocular cunt, GOT is the funniest bastard on the net, The Eye is bouncing back to health and Mr T Stats is an inspiration to us all. (I don't get paid for this you know.)

On the right you will find a bunch of links to various ne'er do wells that are capable of side splitting posts as well as incisive observations on the sad state of the UK. Click on them and be amazed at just how deep the shit is in this once proud nation.

Helicopter production Stats will now follow.




Thursday 9 July 2009

Message for Bob Ainsworth.

Home Secretary Branded a Coward.

Alan Johnson doesn't seem to want to intervene in the Gary Mckinnon extradition despite Lord Carlile stating that he Should and Could.


The fact is that of course it’s easier for Alan Johnson to lay low and ignore McKinnon’s plight, but he should at least consider the consequences of his cowardice. If he lets a vulnerable man with no previous convictions, who intended and did no real harm, be crushed by legislation designed for brutal, Islamist bombers, he will forfeit what’s left of the public trust in politicians. And the next time he, or the Home Office, try to reassure the British people that some heavy-handed, anti-terrorist, freedom-curtailing law will never be used against an innocent civilian, there will be a two-word reply: Gary McKinnon.



H/T Coffee House

Wednesday 8 July 2009

Bob the Blob Ainsworth.

Pic by Gigits

Ainsworth according to Wikipedia.

Ainsworth first became active in politics as a trade unionist at the Jaguar Cars plant in Coventry, where he worked from 1971, and served in many capacities within the Manufacturing, Science and Finance Union there, including four years as the Branch President. During 1982 and 1983, he was a candidate member of the International Marxist Group, but he was never a full member of that organisation. In 1984, he was elected to the Coventry City Council, and was its deputy leader from 1989–1992.

Enhance your CV Bob by spending a week in Afghanistan with the boys on the front line. Take a few trips out in those well protected vehicles you so kindly provided.

Whats that? Bollocks you say? Not much changes does it your self-serving cunt.

In January 2008 he was recorded by Hansard as saying "absolute bollocks" in Parliament during a complaint about soldiers' equipment. This was later struck from the record after analysis of recordings of the debate could not establish that the remark was made.[4][5]

Ainsworth is one of the 98 MPs who voted to keep their expense details secret.[6] In 2007-8, he claimed the maximum permissible amount of £23,083 for second-home allowances, making him the joint highest claimant.[7]

He has been criticized for alleged excessive claims for repairs to his second home.[7]

On 5 June 2009 he was appointed to the cabinet by Gordon Brown as Secretary of State for Defence, replacing John Hutton. [8] He is the first Labour cabinet minister for over 40 years to have two bollocks.

The Above from Wikipedia.

You going to hop the next one out to unfriendly territory then Bob? They might appreciate you more over there. I mean you can always put it on your expenses. No-one will know, because they're a big bloody secret, aren't they you fat bastard trougher.

Ooooh Nursey!!


Gordon is Speshul.

Sunday 5 July 2009

Wishful Thinking?

If Only!

EU Flexes Muscles, Gordon Shits Himself

The Indie:

"The Government is terrified that the EU is getting ready to issue an ultimatum over Lloyds and RBS, forcing them to break up following the massive state injections of capital last autumn. This row is heating up and is likely to come to a head quite soon."



"Urgent negotiations are taking place between the Treasury, UKFI, the agency which controls the Government’s shareholding in Lloyds, and the EU. Treasury sources said they hoped that some sort of deal could be thrashed out ahead of the August deadline set by the EU. "

Saturday 4 July 2009

Germany v Brussels

There are no flies on the Barking Spider who posted this at The Voice of The Resistance

"Sixty-five years ago, heroic Colonel Claus von Stauffenberg made his claim to go down as a glorious name in German history when he led the failed 1944 assassination plot against Hitler.
Today, his third son, Count Franz Ludwig von Stauffenberg, is leading the German resistance against the Lisbon Treaty — and in the past week won a vital victory.
He secured a sensational ruling from the German constitutional court that the powers of the Berlin parliament must be significantly strengthened before Germany signs on the dotted line of the document which will create a centralised EU superpower.
This landmark decision has massive implications not just for Germany, but also for Britain.
This is because there will now be a long delay in the ratification of the Lisbon Treaty which could well string out the process until after the British general election.
This has fascinating ramifications.
David Cameron has bravely pledged a European referendum if the Treaty has not been ratified and he becomes Prime Minister.
It now looks possible that his first major drama as Tory PM would be to lead the ‘No’ camp in a referendum on the Treaty.
Of course, this might embarrass Cameron because the Tories risk a major split, with pro-Europe Ken Clarke taking up an opposing position.
But my guess is that Cameron will win a ‘No’ vote and achieve a massive victory in the war against euro-federalism."

G.O.T On A Roll...............


Check out the new GOTness here.

Friday 3 July 2009

Woo, Woo, All aboard The Gravy Train.

Government not a cashpoint says Mandy as he buys a trainset for Gordon to play with

OI Johnson, NO!


You cannot be Fucking trusted with our personal details you Cunt. Stop telling porkies and wind your neck in, before that nose gets so long that you overbalance.

Longrider says it better than me here.

Wednesday 1 July 2009

Mr Zero Percent, Now With Added G.O.T.



Gordon has been GOT at again.

Hot In The Nether Regions?

Then You need one of these!!!



  • Zero percent effective 100% of the time!
  • Fits in your back pocket.
  • Automatically fails to operate.
  • Will not interfere with smearing or innuendo.
  • Tested and submitted to committee.
  • Now subject to a major inquiry (in private.)
  • As useless as anything NuLabour has ever produced.

Zero Percent Rise Explained


Thanks to Fraser Nelson yet again.

But there's no one to check

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